October 28, 2003

A coward no more

I have always been a coward...with guys.

This past Sunday I faced that fear when I told a guy that I had a thing for him. As most girls know, telling a guy that you like him is not an easy thing, especially when it is traditionally the guy that makes the first move. But I made the move, and I felt terribly pitiful.

Why? Because of those traditions. I thought that by telling a guy that you like him, you are going against that "hard-to-get" game--very pitiful. But you know what? I am happy that I told him; now he knows. And though there isn't a way for us to be together now (schedules, jobs-we want more than weekends), a burden has been lifted. I never have been the traditional type. hehehe

The problem now is that those feelings are out there. Is a friendship possible, an awkward one at best? Hmmmm. With time....

This is torture--relationships suck.

Posted by Amanda Cochran at October 28, 2003 9:46 AM
Comments

Bravo, my friend. That does take guts. I know. I told a guy how I felt once with a poem at the movies. He shrugged it off, and I'm forever scarred by that experience. *ugh* I'm tired of being single right now, but I don't have time to sink into a relationship. *sigh* oh well... there's a time and a place for everything, I guess.

Posted by: KarissaKilgore at October 28, 2003 10:50 AM

That is funny. We both said the same thing: that this isn't the right time, but I had to get my feelings "out there".

I mean he is a great guy, but he holds me, yes me, up on this pedastal that I cannot get down from. He looks at me, my family, my faith and dare I say it? Innocence. And finds that I should remain in that elevated position. But he is there too.

A recently converted Christian, he has a love of God that I haven't felt in such a long time, but I feel that love when I am with him, sharing with him.

He doesn't think he is worthy. I would not have said that I liked him if I didn't think him wonderful.

I know he has a past, but overcoming that is a large part of his attraction. He can say that he was wrong. Humble, kind, respectful. For goodness sake, he calls my mom, Mrs. Cochran!!

He can say I am wrong, too. He can stand up to me (I like that).

And overall, I can trust him. This may not be the time, but he may be the guy.

Posted by: Amanda at October 28, 2003 8:42 PM

what a crush, dear. That's rough.... but give things time. Maybe just go out once or twice to stay connected, but don't give yourselves the titles "bf" and "gf" yet. Date. It's the FUN part!

good luck, dearest. Sounds like you met Mr. Right at the wrong time... doesn't that beat all? ;)

Posted by: KarissaKilgore at October 29, 2003 7:46 AM

Goof for you Amanda. I have been both sides of this issue, I have been interested in girls who weren't interested in me, and vice versa. Yes, it is torture, and the whole process sucks. But what other choice do we have?

Posted by: Paige at October 29, 2003 4:02 PM

Good for you Amanda. I have been both sides of this issue, I have been interested in girls who weren't interested in me, and vice versa. Yes, it is torture, and the whole process sucks. But what other choice do we have?

Posted by: Paige at October 29, 2003 4:02 PM
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