< Haiku you do | Main | A Rip-Off You Can't "Rip" >
November 3, 2005
I Was Just Going to Say...
Everyone has said it. All students. All ages, but mostly college. (I've heard some professors say it, too.) None of us are exempt, and there is no inoculation to prevent a serious epidemic of "Well, I was just going to say..."s from floating out of the mouths of well-meaning, intelligent-minded people of the world.
Someone makes a point. You counter the point in your mind, and think of what you'd like to say. This used to be a "no-no," called "listening with your answer running," but having a response to others in discussion requires this basic mental multi-tasking.
"I was just going to say..."
Oh, were you? Then why are you talking now?
Weren't you going to say something? Well, you're saying it, aren't you? Then isn't the precursor of "I was just going to say" entirely superfluous?
Yeah, it is. But we all seem to say it anyway.
Anymore I am becoming highly annoyed with this filler phraseology. I consciously refrain from saying it. If I feel it coming on—the latent, idyllic, transitory phrase shooting from my larynx, flossing my teeth with harsh, unnatural vibrations—I choke on it. I sit, unvocal, till I find a more intelligent transition to connect my point of discussion with the academic conversation.
Another phenomenally overused transition in discussion is “Going off of that…” or “Going along with that…” and “Going along with what he/she said.” Oh really. So were the things that other people thought of saying not related to "that" or what "he/she said"? Referencing points of discussion is fine--but do so in a less-obvious, more academic manner than just "going off" or "going along..."
Utterly pointless words such as these spill out of students' mouths like putrid trash from a ripped Glad bag onto the floor of the classroom. It's unexpected, tears viciously through any decent flow of conversation exposing the human inability to connect thoughts without including oneself in the exterior analysis, and breaks down the communication process at large. No bone in my body is “Glad” as I suffer blow after senseless blow from this overused, unnecessary phrase that contributes nothing to the discussion.
It might seem harsh for me to write in such terms. But quite honestly it's a disruption to the conversation! If we stopped saying "I was just going to say..." and just said whatever it is that prompts us to raise our hands there would be a better flow.
And if you weren't "just going to say" whatever it is that is spewing from your mouth, then why should I care? If it's relevant and adds something to the discussion, then don't announce you were "just going to say" or "go off of that," JUST DO IT.
Don't put a qualifier before your response, just respond.
Posted by KarissaKilgore at November 3, 2005 1:45 PM
Comments
I love reading your blogs about language, Karissa.
Some of those filler statements are content-free, such as the ones you rightly compain about, but others actually accomplish something, such as "I don't mean to be offensive, but.." or "Let me see if I understand you here..."
So there are sometimes culturally appropriate fillers that indicate respect or a willingness to listen.
Posted by: Dennis G. Jerz at November 3, 2005 4:31 PM
Thanks, Dr. Jerz! Glad you enjoy this semi-rant... I can appreciate the fillers with purpose, like the ones you mentioned above, but when that seems to be the bulk of what someone is saying? Oh, wow, do I get riled up.
In addition to trying to train myself not to use these lame fillers, I'm trying to filter the "um"s and "uh"s and "like"s out of my responses. A more intelligent sounding response, in general, is what I'm shooting for. Pauses for thought composition are more appropriate, in my opinion.
Posted by: Karissa at November 3, 2005 6:16 PM
Karissa you are so ridiculously talented at writing...
You blow my mind!
Miss seeing ya around roomie!
xOx
Miz
Posted by: Mel Whiteman at November 7, 2005 12:47 AM