October 30, 2003
Reading to Class
Since it's the day before Halloween, today I read my own writing to my poetry writing class. I'm not the typical English teacher; I'm an actively publishing writer of "horror" fiction and poetry so whenever I do readings like this, it always opens some eyes. The students were very interested, since we'd had a discusson about "genre poetry" last meeting and they were warned that what I do is a little over the top. My work is both frighteningly bizarre and darkly comic; my delivery isn't really scary but earnestly humorous. And today I think it paid off the way I'd hoped....
To put some context on the discussion, I talked about the publication procress as I did a little show-and-tell of books I've been in. This made it a valuable teaching day in my mind and not just an egoistic performance -- and since I ask them to perform a poetry reading themselves at the end of the term I thought I'd put my neck out on the line first. (It was perfect timing, too, since my glossy little book of verse, Gorelets, just arrived in today's mail!).
I've read poetry and fiction in almost every creative writing course I've taught. Although it risks, among other things, losing the respect of a minority of the students, it's always a liberating moment for just about everyone. It's not simply a matter of being entertained. The horror stuff is just weird enough and laughable enough to make them question their assumptions about me and about poetry writing, I like to think it opens their eyes to how imaginative one can be when approaching this material. As I read, I explain my process -- what effects I'm going for, what failures I think I detect, what exercises I was trying out. But beyond the teacherly element of this, the students get to see me in a new role, a writerly role, which lightens things up for the rest of the term. And at the same time they get to see whether I practice what I preach. It's freeing to me because I get to let my hair down, but also a little frightening to put my work out there to a classroom filled with the very students I have been training to critique others with an eagle eye all term. I've got a thick skin, and I often poke fun at myself as I read (mostly by laughing at the outrageousness of some of it -- it still surprises even me)... but reading my work to my students still makes me a little squeamish -- not just because of what they might say or think, but because of the influence it might have on their own writing and the way it irrevocably changes the class dynamic. What if they try to imitate me for imitation's sake, and the next time I collect their portfolios discover they're all writing about heads bobbing in fryer's lard or silly monsters in masks that haunt the hockey rink? This is rare, but some students do this. I try to impress upon them that they follow my lead only in that I want them to be themselves, to express themselves honestly, while also stretching their imagination and trying to practice the elements of good poetry writing. I tell them to write for the reader they are and since I love to read in the horror genre, I hold myself accountable to that kind of reader. But I don't hold myself up as a model that the students should imitate at all, unless they're already horror writers. Nevertheless, it's been my experience that reading my work aloud only benefits the class dynamic: it inspires students to try harder, to maybe even see themselves as practitioners rather than students, and they often become more collegial, easy-going, and creative.
I like to think I work towards this moment in my creative writing courses, when the class shifts from what is almost a teacher-centered focus on the principles of writing (we dialogue about the textbook for 2/3 of the semester, even as we workshop) to a student-centered focus on their own identities as writers (we progressively talk more and more about their own writing instead of the book's, and we conclude with both a student poetry reading and the publication of their work in an online anthology I produce shortly before final's week...). The tipping point, ironically, is often a day like today, when I fully dominate the class... what happens is that in their eyes the teacher becomes more of a writer (just like they might see themselves) than a teacher. They know I'm a writer from the beginning, but few seek out my writing... when I bring it to them, I think I earn their respect in a different way then just having a PhD and I really get to share the results of my own writing all semester, too. For that's something they often don't realize: that I'm engaged in the same sort of struggles and experiments that they've been engaged in all along.
[If any lurking students from that class are reading this, I invite you to post your reaction, good or bad. If not, no big deal!]
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I confessed to one of my basic writing classes yesterday that I started writing a mystery over the summer, and I talked to them about my writing process. I say "confessed" because very few people know I'm doing it. They seemed interested and were supportive.
I'm not sure why I told them, but now I'm glad I did. I was able to say to them honestly, "I'm writing right now, too, and here's how it goes sometimes."
One of my favorite in-class exercises is to show students quotations from reviews that totally trash a creative work that I submitted to a contest, and then show a different collection of quotations from the very same reviews that put a completely different spin on my work. I submitted the work under a pen name, so I first ask students to review and comment on the same work. I like demonstrating that, even though criticism hurts, I not only take it when it is offered, but actively seek it out in order to improve my skills.
I still remember some of the work that you shared last Halloween in Major Writers, and its not because I was traumatized, but rather that it held a lasting impression.
I had a teacher in high school who also shared her work with us; she did the in-class excercises with us, and shared her writing along with the class. I think that on a certain level it brings the reality to students that writing begins in the classroom, and its where you take it from there that determines the potential that you have as a writer.
I really enjoyed hearing your work, and it was interesting to learn the background for some of your writing. I think that a lot of students enjoyed hearing your work, and did learn that poetry does not have "creative boundries."
In my last blog entry I wrote about how beneficial it is for K-College teachers to dialogue about their experiences. From reading your blog I am surprised to find that we elementary school educators share many of the same issues as you do--revising the curriculumn to create clearer expectations, maneuvering through standards and objectives in a way that is student focused vs. measurable results focused, common grading, etc. And now, I find we have a common outlook on sharing our writing with the class--to create a more collaborative classroom environment and inspire creativity vs. just modeling the process. Last semester I wrote a humorous fictional narrative called "Freaky Six-Toes" about a child who is ostacized. It blended honesty, surprise, and freaky/strange humor. To my great surprise, the students became very inspired to take risks, be thoughtful about their word choice, and collaborate--asking each other what they thought about a certain dialogue, etc without being asked to do so. At first, I was afraid they might just copy my story. But instead, they copied my attitude--try it out, think about how to say it, and share. So, I'm glad to read here that the learning trajectory continues!