2007 Commencement Speaker Announced!

Because I am so close to the decision makers at this university, I was able to influence their choice for the commencement speaker at my graduation in 2007. As you know, this year is Steve Sheetz, the genius behind the Sheetz gas stations and MTOs. It is my honor to present you with the 2007 commencement speaker:

OLMEK from Legends of the Hidden Temple. That's right, the giant talking stone face from the mid-nineties Nickelodeon game show. He is not only a wonderful role model, but he is a fountain of knowledge. Minus the fountain part.

Originally, SHU tried to get Moira Quirk, also known as Moe, from Nick's sports show GUTS. Unfortunately, she didn't want to fly in from England. Man, she is so hot.

So Olmek will be giving the guest speech at graduation. It will be a good speech, teaching about life and planning for the future, and telling about the Golden Griffin. After the speech, Kurt Fogg has agreed to ask us questions about what we just heard. While we answer questions, for each one we get correct we are allowed to move forward. Those who reach the finish line first will receive diplomas. Anyone else wanting a diploma will have to retrieve it from Maura, watching out for the Temple Guards.