Hazard's Lake Fight

While on vacation at Put-in-Bay, I learned a lot about the War of 1812. Specifically, the story of Lt. Oliver Hazard Perry and his Erie-brawl with the Brits that led to the end of the war.

Oliver Perry's middle name was "Hazard," and he really lived up to it. Just when it seemed all was lost and his ship was sinking, he grabbed his homemade flag (which read "Dont give up the ship") and jumped ship! The man carried his grammatically-challenged flag on to a small raft and rowed it (amongst a hail of gunfire) to a different ship! He went on to win the war in just under three hours. Sure it may seem as if he disobeyed the very flag that has come to define the man-- he gave up the first ship, which was sinking, for the second, winning, ship. But really, if you think about it, he didn't give up the "ship" (in quotes). He didn't give up in the battle, even when it looked like all was lost.

If you compare this harrowing story with many of the other historical figures with interesting names, you can tell that Oliver Hazard Perry was something special. Just look at all the other ill-fitted middle names of the past: Edgar Pants Hoover, Myles Clean-Blanket Standish, William Howard Vivacious Taft, Hannibal Surly Hamlin, Adolf Scategories Hitler. None of them lived up to their names. None of em.