A letter that was found written by Doug that was never sent to his brother Pat:
After Janet Broke my heart, I was lost. I didn't know who I was-she was my everything. But then on evening I was walking through Welfareville I saw a carnival. As I was watching the children scream in horror and hold on for dear life on the merry mixer that I realized that this was my new destiny. The man controlling the ride-Jose Rico-was who I wanted to be, in control of others-almost the way Janet was in control of my heart. So I searched for Slick Willy, the owner/operator of the carnival, to get me a job. I did, and I really enjoyed it. But it wasn't until I met Dexter, a short guy who runs the midget tossing booth, that I wasn't really happy. He told me about his love for Ester, who also to be the bearded lady-but was really just a post-op tranny. Dexter taught me that it wasn't control that Janet had over me, but that my heart was still aching to be with her. So after dinner one night I told all my new friends my plan to try and win back the love of my life. They wished me well and told me I always had a home with them if I ever needed a place to rest. I am really going to miss them. But I know what I have to do.
P.S. (Bonus-Bonus-name the movie of the quote-should be easy)
"Gobble Gobble one of us".