In class yesterday I was put to disgrace as Chris read my Final Paper to me out loud. Let me just put in gently I am done for. I wish I would have had someone else read it because I put the wrong word in my thesis, but in my mind it read what I wanted it to read everytime I looked over it. I did enjoy this activity don't get me wrong, I just hate hearing the things I write out loud. It makes me come to a very depressing conclusion, I'm a poor writer, with ever worse grammar problems. I have no structure or train of thought. I am a misplaced soul currently bobbing around the English field with no present experience.
Yes, I enjoy writing, am I good at it? Apparently not. Also I hate to be the one to do this but I feel I was misguided by the poor teachings of my past. Where did all this critical junk come in? Maybe I really was in a comatose, unconcious state through out all of my English classes and never realized that I am not cut out to be what I think I am.
Reading Chris's paper I thought - wow! I know he worked hard and has an excellent paper. I love reading Chris's work because it is so insightful and almost scholarly, it gives me something to strive for, considering well probably be in the same classes for the next few years. I really think his topic was awesome and I am jealous I couldn't think of something so in depth, but still on the surface.
I understand almost everyone in that class is at a different level of maturity and development of writing and researching. Me sometimes I wonder...I know I am lagging at the tale end. I am proud though because I didn't drop the class, I did improve some what. Sure I may not be where I want to, I may never be. I don't know what I want in life and this is just one more experince to guide me in a new direction.
Again back to Foster, this section I actually enjoyed. Is that a symbol? I am the skeptic and believe that writers just write there is nothing more behind it. So to say everything is a symbol and I can define it however I want - this might have been more helpful at the beginning of the semster. I'm not saying I'm against symbolism but when I come across challening, help me grow texts like The Diamond Age it is hard for me to identify a symbol because I'm so busy trying to understand the plot line - hey maybe this is a symbol! This section really was helpful I had just wish it was read earlier, not to mention I wish it hadn't been something like The Diamond Age I was trying to symbolism with.
Katherine Hayles wrote an article entitled Is Mutopia Obselete?, withing this article she talks about nanotechnology and the effect all technologies have on the cost of life. Within The Diamond Age we see this referenced. There technology does not make them pay directly but what about indirectly?
Giving up your life to be inpregnanted and sacrificed to nanaosites? Something doesn't seem so thrilling about this and other events mentiioned in the book. And Nell is at the center of this thriving off of the Primer as her source of life.
Would you give up your life, even if it wasn't that great and devote yourself to a book the way she did? Although she does and niether does the auidence know the outcome of giving herself over to this book. Does she consider that knowledge comes at a price? If it didn't I think just about everyone would attend college. You cannot expect something for free now, so why would a future society give away such vaulable information. Not only that but are we even sure that Nell wants to become Queen and rule over this army?
To be in power we must give up certain choices, like Nell had to. The cost of a life we may feel is worth living isn't becuase we have lost the ability to choose our own path. Personally I thought the book was suppose to go to a different little girl because all it needed was a young girl to open it. How can we be sure that this was Nell's fate? Technology doesn't give us as many options as we are used to having.
Think about it like this, have you ever signed up for anything online? Drop boxes fall with, at the most, full of ten options. One of them is normally occupations, if you do not fit into those ten things you have just become 'other'. Do we really want technology to over take us to a point where we just become a world of other?
Over the summer I read The Color of Water by James McBride then again for EL150 was asked to read it again. Skiming the book and remember the conversation I was involved in this book to me is something so simple, sure it deserves attention, but there are many other people like Mama who live this life everyday. Not all of us can produce off springs that can be so successful and share our life story though.
When reading this story I was introduced to alot of different ideas, first and for most the idea of a big family. I come from a small family so I don't know what it is like to have 5 other siblings. To me I have friends and my friends are my extended family, so if you would go along these lines then yes I have plenty of siblings. The most intriging thing to me here is that a child experinces things like watching their mother, like Mama, have a hard time in life. She is young, beautiful and single yet still has not room to support her children. It's not even due to opression because she is white and under no circumstances must she reveal her religion. Seeing this I believe is what gave her children the ability to strive for something better in life.
Along with this aspect of the story also the line, where the title comes from, stayed with me. When mama tells James that God is the color of water. I think this is a very unusally comment. Most of the time I think the color of water is blue, well this was my first reaction, thinking about a clear beautiful ocean. Then it hit me, what word did I just use? Clear, translucent, water has no color. Not so much to say that water is white, but this is the absence of all colors, I do believe. So Mama has described God as clear to her children, what would be the reasoning for this. I think it has alot to do with her wanting them to not be scared if they are something different. If they come across someone who is not the same color or person as them. Later we can see through the action of the children that this can effect them because they do stand up for themselves and what they are part of. Color, gender it doesn't not matter to them because she begins teaching them so young to be so open minded. She teaches them everything and everyone is acceptable.
This I believe is the book's most important message because no so many children grow up without a mother or father figure to guide them and so them what acceptance is. Even those that do have both or one parent to guide them sometimes reject their parents or are still taught the wrong things by closed minded ignorant parents who were brought up by hate. A message of acceptance in a world where no one will speak thier mind in public but bash everyone in private is a very positive symbol.
Finally I understand life is hard and I feel more tributes like this should go out to single mothers and fathers. Even if you can't write and get published, sit down and show your parent/s appreciation. Being a parent, a single parent even more, is the most important and challenging job in the world. We cannot let it just slip away and let our children grow on their own. Much like in the Diamond Age without the positive message of the Primer would Nell have been able to accomplish anything in her life? Every child needs a role model and I think every parent should read this book so they can give their children the support they need. No matter if you are broke, discriminated against, or anything else. Everyone has potential to live life and make it something better.
Yes this book was rough, diffucult, hard, down right impossible for some to read. What book? Neal Stephson's The Diamond Age, let me be honest here, because I know you all can agree. While reading this book I would sit down and read 5 pages then look at the book in astonishment because I had no clue what just went on and how I had gotten this far in the book. Amazing how your mind wonders sometime isn't it? There were certain sections of this that I would get beyond involved in though and read with a smile on my face. I know, unlike some people, I'm a big fan of Nell. :-) I guess in my mind I just find her simply adorable and further more I find her a powerhouse for women. Sure in the end she becomes a queen of young women but I see her in another light.
Within in the story it seems like Nell has grown up without a mother, until the Primer comes along and introduces Nell and Purple. Now I'm not a fan of Purple because she seems a bit to protective of Nell, almost like she is holding her back from growing and learning. Her real mother never actually held her back, but their finanical situation, which she never took motivation to change, affects Nell's growth and learning. Maybe I just have sympathy for Nell, but I think that she is a very able and independent young girl, even without the Primer. I know the Primer would put her in situation basically before they would happen but have you ever listened to a book?
It sounds nearly insane to listen to what a book has to say and apply it to real life, unless you like sappy romances I guess. Nell does though she looks and learns, she tries, how many of you have ever tried something you saw in a book, and I don't mean a how to book? If you were reading a fairytale like Rapunzel, would you let your friends try to climb up your hair? I say it would be a bit painful. I understand the Primer teaches in a different sense by giving Nell lessons that you can apply to real life, maybe she's just lucky.
Still Nell gives her independance a personality as she grows and when she finally rids herself of Purple this is when she is about to take her stand. She rids herself of Purple close to the middle of her journey and we start to become less aware of the Primer in her life. A transition of growth, saying I don't need motherly advice for I can stand on my own two feet now.
The stand Nell takes at the end by becoming queen really shows her power. The Primer has helped to shape Nell into the position she is made for. The question that bothers me is, if Nell was made to be in this position, then is it the Primer or fate who choose her, she would be here either way so she would have had to use her independance to gain this...
Okay I'll admit it I can't get into the geeky technology books, this is the reason that I still have to blog about Pick Up Axe and The Diamond Age. So let's start with Axing because I think this was the more interesting and less "growth reading" of the two stories. Ok when you look at it from the serious aspect of life it is three friends who are basically geeks. Keith seems to me almost like an idiot savant, or maybe just immature, who knows. How can someone be so intelligent to the point where they can do all this programming and still act like they are in high school?
Sure we all have talents in different areas but Keith just seems to be throwing away his life to act out on the immature impluses. This could be related to college in a way now that I think about it. I know people who have gone to college with a 4.0 or close GPA, except there is one difference this is the first time they have stepped away from their parents into a world their own. Just like Keith they have an immature and irrespondsible attitude - I know you guys have watched this happen this year -let's blow off every assigment, run around and party, forget the importance of what we are here for. Oh and above all let me make myself, the pride and joy of my family look like a complete idiot because I decided I wanted to have fun so I went from a 4.0 to a 1.2 GPA. Now I'm not saying this happens to everyone. I understand the guys, or at least I think the guys, in Pick up Axe are old enough to be out of college. We don't see any flashbacks in this play so we can only assume this was Keith in college, or maybe he missed out on this phase becase he is going through it now.
Brian and Mick are a bit different, they remind of someone who comes to college and does actually strive beyond their potential. The thing that I don't get with Brian and Mick is they are so organized and put together yet fail to see Keith destorying them. I looked at this as the way the world of business really does work. Sure we've all made promises in life, but what about getting a better deal? So people will do whatever it takes to get ahead, lie, cheat, steal. Mick and Brian seem like the kind of guys who are to nice to do this so they ride it out and just deal with Keith's poor attitude, unaware of what they are in for.
As much as I wish I could analyze these characters in a psychological way, I have no background to do that. I think it might be worth looking into this because people may view Keith as just another child, stupid and immature. Still it is up to the audience in this world of survival of the fittest, maybe Keith being immature and careless gives him a leg up to get where he needs to be in this world.
If you wanna know more about the characters I like Vanessa's blog and how she sees Keith, I believe ADD toddler is the pharse used.
Surpised to see my back in the blog o sphere? Well, I'm still kickin and so on and so forth. I'm going to be updating alot in the next couple of days starting with my presentation.
I wrote my paper on Death of A Salesman by Arthur Miller, and changed the title to Death of a Housewife.
Thesis:Within Death of a Salesman by Arthur Miller our main character, Willy Loman, gives fatherhood a turn in another direction; he may not be a stay at home mother but Loman portrays very feminine qualities as well as a past desire to pinoneer stay at home dads.
The beginning of my paragraph talks about the normal 1950s family leading up to the fact that the Lomans may have been a bit off key.
I conclude with expressing the counter argument of how at first glance the Lomans look like the picture perfect family of the 1950s then develop into the fact that Willy has a much more matural drive than his wife Linda.
Most of my sources refer to the families of the 1950s I do have a few interesting ones on reading and gender as well as Criticisms of Death of a Salesman. My favorite article contains a refers to Willy planting in the garden and relates him to another female character from London.
I don't like my thesis or my paper, Kellyn has offered some suggestion of where to cut down so I can incorporate more about the gardening, other than that I'm open for many many suggestions.