Insecure & (not confident) men
If any of you haven't read T.S. Elliot's: The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock then i highly suggest you do. It's a wonderful poem with a lot of symbolism. Here's your chance to read it if you haven't already....
The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
In my opinion, this man is in a room looking for love. He watches the "women come and go talking of michelangelo." This man goes unnoticed by the women he is trying to get attention from. He feels very alone, and its making him numb and he wants to feel love. He wants to ask a woman to marry him, but he is afraid of being rejected. He is self concious of his baldness " with a bald spot in the middle of my hair -" By stating an insecurity, he shows that he fears rejection.
He has "measured out his life with coffee spoons;" I think this means that he spends his day contemplating what to do with his lonely life. He seems to be in conflict with time, and the last of his days because he's worried that a woman will not want him and he'll have to spend the rest of his life alone.
"Sprawling on a pin" I think is the same pin on his tie. He's stuck to his life like a fly would on fly paper. If he's not too careful he could get pricked.
Now, i know i usually have some kind of question after each of my entry, but after reading or experiencing something...how can i not?? haha, well anyway here's today's question(s). Why are men so afraid of rejection when it comes to women. The only way i can see that particular point of view is if the girl and guy have been friends for an extensive amount of time. In this case, i understand that friendship could be lost..but if this isn't the case, then what do you have to lose?
How does this apply to bernice bobs her hair? Was Warren afraid of losing the friendship between himself and marjorie? I think he felt that if he did everything that she asked him to, then she would see how much he cared for her...and then in turn fall madly in love with him. WHich is not the case, if a guy does this, it shows that the woman has power over the man. THe man in this sense is weak. I think marj used warren because she knew that she had power over him. In my opinion, the best thing to do is to talk about it, be upfront, and my reactions, mentally and physcially you should be able to tell the truth. Unless they are so unbelievably blind that... well it would be a lost cause.
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I have pretty much the same take on the poem as you do, I will never understand the male insecurity issues. I even thought it was worse, I didnt see the reference to Michelangelo as a specific person, but perhaps and ideal male. To me the man feels inferior and sees the other men as greats that he could never compete with.
As for Warren in "Bernice Bobs Her Hair" you give him far more credit than I do. I dont think I would even really consider his relationship with Marjorie a friendship. I think like his Rolls Royce, he wanted to have the best, and at that time Marjorie was it. She just wouldnt have him. Then when Bernice became the most sought after girl he switched to her, then back again after she cut her hair. I dont think any of it really had to do with love or friendship, I think it was merely about possession.
I agree with you completely. I like the reference of his life being like a fly stuck to fly paper. When you think about it, it's a scary life, no way out, no place to go. Trapped by your own insecurities.
Guys are afraid of looking stupid. If a guy asks a girl out and is rejected, the story is immediately known by all her friends, and all their friends. This brutal cycle therebye effectively kills any chance that the guy in question might have had with all those other girls. It's a lose lose situation, because if the same girl says yes and then they break up the same cycle occurs only worse. Sheesh but we've got it rough.