I'm Not Living in a Box

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"The... problem has to do with those times when, after working on your novel or reading selections of Rilke, you lie awake at night and think to yourself, What am I doing? For crying out loud, I'm writing about corn nuts for a living.  Feelings of fraudulence can open a Pandora's box, releasing guilt, anger, resentment, isolation, loneliness, and a dozen other demons."  (Lemire 167)

Besides for my burning desire to want to teach, this is another reason why I decided to go into education.  I didn't want to become that starving artist or stuck in a dead end job writing about things that would suck my creativity, just so I could major in English.  I didn't want to have to write about corn nuts or be a waitress or anything like that just so I could write my novel.  Hey, at least with teaching, I could have the summer off to write, even though my professor said that you should never say that the reason why you go into teaching is for the summers.  And believe me, I want to teach, there's nothing else I want to do more than teach -- well, except sell a couple million books and go on a world wide book tour and sell my books to movie producers to make amazing movies out of.  But besides that, I can't wait to teach. 

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