July 8, 2004

An Interesting Sister

From diaper genies, to sticker collections, to hair pulling fights, and finally cars, Katie and I have shared everything for as long as I can remember. Sisters are required to do that.

And now, just when things are starting to go well--the hairpulling stops and the tears taper off--she refuses to tell me things. I have become the older sister that she doesn't tell me anything about her life because her activities may be illegal, or frightening to the older, protective sister--me.

I can understand, and that is probably the most problematic element of this entire situation; I probably wouldn't tell my older sister what I planned to do with my friends if I knew she may be a tattle-tale risk.

However, I don't think she understands where I stand on this whole older sister deal. I wanted to do all the things she is doing now. And I respect her for taking those risks.

Why didn't I do them? I was too busy in high school, building my incredible college resume, to do fun stuff exclusively with pals. Most of my friendships were built around the activity I was taking part in, and when that play, recital, publication session or season came to a close, so did the short-lived connection.

The entirety of my party time in high school was movie nights about once a month, which ended at 11:00 because I had actually followed the driving curfew. Or sleepovers, with my close-knit group of pals that were all as relatively subdued as I.

Okay, so you are probably all thinking I am some kind of exhaust pipe rusting away in your basement, but I assure you that I am not. My passions have always existed in work, and I am proud that I can give my all to something, but now, more than ever, I am starting to see how interesting life could be if I would just loosen up, and follow my sister's lead.

I have been the example for years, always doing the "right" thing, and now, seeing her so happy, so wonderfully excited about her life and future, I question what is really the "right" thing.

And what I have come to discover is that she is the interesting one. She is the one shaving creaming houses and talking into the wee hours of the morning on the phone. She is the one still making all of her payments on her car, still getting through school, and still having a marvelous time.

Can't I do the same? I hope so, because I was on the brink of crazy this past year. I don't want to do it again. Let's hope some experience in college time management will help in this ongoing balance battle.

I am sending out an SOS to mes amies. With the school year fast approaching, I ask that you stop me if I am sitting reading a book on a Friday night, tell me to--no, take the book from me--until at least Saturday. Even if I pummel you with my cold fists take it, hide it, and tell me to "get interesting" (that's the new "it" phrase, after all :-)). Tell me to go egg someone. It is for my own good.

I will be grateful in the long run. If that happens, just get me a cappuchino. A cappuchino and a pet squirrel. That's all I want.

Posted by Amanda Cochran at July 8, 2004 12:48 AM

I'm just going to smile and nod, and promise that I'll always get you cappuchino when you need it--even if you don't say you need it :^)

Posted by: Karissa at July 8, 2004 9:09 AM

I really wasn't serious about the pet squirrel thing. I like to see them free. The family that I work for have a house way back in the woods, and many, many squirrels live in the close vacinity. I love eating my Honey Bunches of Oats and watching them in the morning climb up the trees and gather morsels of nutty goodness.

Summer at its finest.

Posted by: Amanda at July 8, 2004 8:34 PM

Amanda??? I guess I have been a grammy too long I do not understand some of the things you wrie but I do understand FUN, as long as you take time for God. At 75 we still go to the Shriners once a month to dance, NOt anythingtoo wild can't do that, I hurt too much, but round dancing is good exercise and fun. The yellow haired grammy

Posted by: grammy at July 8, 2004 9:04 PM

As an older sister I feel your pain. In highschool I was also more worried about my grades than my social life. I was always more interested in reading a good book curled up on my porch (weather permitting of course) than heading out to the wild high school party.

I ended high school with one of the best friends I will ever have, but as I watch my brother head out with his girlfriend and continually tie up the phone line, I wonder to myself what my life would be like today if I had been like him. You know what I discovered...I discovered that I like the way my life is now. And I owe it to those times in high school that I stayed home instead of going out because now I know when I need to get work done and when I can go and have a good time...

Wow...this turned into a talking to. Sorry bout that...


Posted by: Tiffany at July 12, 2004 1:35 PM

While I do see your point, Tiffany, I also see that I cannot draw that line as readily as you seem to do.

I find myself trapped in my work, sitting on the sidelines watching. I want to live, and not through my sister.

Finally, I am making decisions in that direction, and finally, I am taking control of my life--not the other way around.

Posted by: Amanda at July 13, 2004 1:07 AM
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