March 04, 2004

Rayn On Me (An Excerpt)



I walked all night along the highway. I tried to hitch a couple of rides. I guess it scared people to see a pregnant woman walking along the side of the road. They must think that I am crazy. But I don’t care. I know what I have to do.
As I tread slowly along the dampened soil of the road I thought about T.J. I wondered what he would say when he saw me. Hopefully he would just take me in his arms and make love to me like we used to in the darkened gazebos on warm spring nights in MacArthur Park.
Not seeing T.J. for 3 months was eating me up inside. For the past year and a half I hadn’t gone one day with out seeing the love of my life. But that all ended abruptly a couple of months ago when my parents put me in the home.

It hurt me inside to think that my parents didn’t think I was capable of taking care of a child. “You cant even take care of yourself,” my mother would say and those conversations would usually end with me storming out the front door of our house and not returning until three days later.
Despite what my mother might think, I know that I am fully capable of taking care this baby. T.J. and I will give it all the love we bare and we will finally have a real family. That’s what I want more than anything. I purposely got pregnant by T.J. for this reason, so that we can have a piece of each other and be bonded together forever, a real family.
“Go away for awhile and think about what you’re going through. I know a good establishment for younger woman like yourself,” my father told me, “and when this is all over you can came home and well figure out what is next.” I loved and admired my father dearly and the only reason I decided to join the home was to make him happy. T.J. reminded me of him so much, tall dark and handsome, strong minded, strong willed, and strong hearted. T.J. is all the things that I want my child to be and I know that he is going to make a terrific father.
I have to reach him. We need to be together. I don’t want to go through this pregnancy alone. I need his support and his love right about now because I’m scared and I know that the child living inside of me is scared too.

*This is an excerpt from a short story I wrote. As the story goes on it gets very interesting. Its full of twist ad turns and has an ending you wont ever beleive!

Posted by Carla Rae Jackson at March 4, 2004 02:55 PM
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