24 Jan 2007
Ex 1-1: Diagnostic Essay
In a draft of about 2-3 pages (about 500-750 words), convey your relationship to literature and the English language.
- Do not exceed the maximum length.
Upload your draft to the proper slot on turnitin.com.
As is the case with most exercises, you will also be asked to complete a peer-review assignment for homework, and submit a thoughtful response to the feedback you received. (More details about that will follow.)
Helpful Readings:
- Personal Essays: How to Write Them
Show, Don't (Just) Tell
Crisis vs. Conflict
Step-by-step Instructions for Formatting MLA Papers
Objectives:
- Format pages properly -- 12pt double spaced Times New Roman, following MLA style (title block, header, pagination, etc.).
Demonstrate your commitment to English studies by writing grammatically correct, stylistically pleasing, well-organized prose.
Focus on a single theme and develop it with one or two specific, illuminating examples. Avoid a laundry list.
The following is too general -- it looks like a dry list of things that you might turn into an essay, if you had the time.
Every summer, my dog and I would play in the back yard from sunup to sundown. My mother tried everything to get me to come inside, but it never worked. I loved that dog more than anything, and I was crushed when he got cancer and died.
If you want me to feel the emotional attachment between you and the dog, make me feel that I am there in your backyard on one particular, significant day. Quote some of the actual words that your mother used to get you to come inside. Maybe your mother tempts you with chocolate cake, and your dog sees you edging towards the door, but growls and pounces joyfully on you, tumbling you into a ditch.
While we were lying there, a mass of sweat and dirt and fur and hair, I stroked his belly and we watched the sunset. That's when I first noticed the strange lump on his thigh. The next day at the animal hospital I learned what "malignant" meant, and a few weeks later I knew what "terminal" meant.Do you see how the second version actually draws the reader into the author's thoughts, while the first version is more like a laundry list?
Intended audience: Undeclared SHU freshmen.
Tips
- Be creative, but not overly flowery. If you write a narrative essay, don't confuse crisis and conflict.
Be informative, but not overly dry. If you write an informative essay, your conclusion should not merely summarize what the reader has just read.
Avoid phrases like "I think" or "It seems to me." Your whole essay represents your viewpiont, so there is no need for such labels.
Avoid phrases like "clearly" or "obviously." If what you're saying really is clear, you don't need to label it as such. If what you're saying really isn't clear, adding a label won't help.
Trim needless words. Instead of "hot and moist," write "sultry." Instead of "At that point in time, the realization came to me that, owing to the temperature having rising to a level where I could no longer find any way to be comfortable or even safe, the best of course of action I could take would be to vacate the premises," write "It was hot, so I left."
The scene I beheld was hard to believe. I stared at the mountains, and simply could not make sense of how marvelously high they were. The longer I tried to comprehend them, the taller they seemed to get, the more confused I got, and the more insignificant I felt. I stared with a transfixed expression on my face. The sight was so awesome, I just could not look away.The above passage uses proper grammar and some powerful vocabulary words. You might expect to get an A on a high school paper that uses this kind of writing. But consider the following revision:
The mountains loomed impossibly. I stared through tears of awe, shrinking with each blink.The revision has all the punch of the first version, but has the added virtues of brevity and intensity.
In early papers like this, students often don't find the subject they really want to write about until the bottom of the second page. Once you've found that subject, you should probably cut out the first two pages of fluff, and start over again with your new focus.
- What do you hope to gain from an introduction to literary study? (Rather than listing four or five different things as they pop into your head, build your whole essay around a single idea -- the one thing that you most want to gain from literary study.)
What work of literature has changed your life? Make me feel the impact.
What part of literary study fascinates, annoys, or scares you? Make me feel that same emotion.
Who is your literary hero -- an author or a fictional character?
http://blogs.setonhill.edu/mt/mt-tb.cgi/7829