Two crime articles, both a little pointless
After reading the crime article Would-be robbery victim fights back, I can't help but pick at a few details. One of those details is the whole point of the story. Someone was almost robbed. But he wasn't and no one was hurt. For some reason, I can't see this as being newsworthy unless it is a slow news day. Another problem I had with this article were the random details, such as: Greg O'Neil of Indiana, an employee of the Greensburg Eat-N-Park, was
exiting his car, intending to make a deposit, when he was attacked by a
man who was hiding at the corner of the building. Why does the reader need to know exactly where he works? In my previous entry, I commented on a tip to include the victim. While including the victim in this story makes it more personal, I can't help but laugh at how random this piece of information is used. It seems as if they needed information to fill space as quick as possible.
Another crime article, Plea deal reached in Jeanette enslavement, kidnap case, focuses on a crime that happened in 2007. But why is it news? The newest information presented in this article is that a plea agreement was reached. This article uses a lot of space and words to provide such a simple update. There is also one thing that was confusing about this article. The lead reads: Three family members charged last month with kidnapping and enslaving a 17-year-old-runaway in Jeannette have reached a tentative plea agreement that includes jail time. By saying they were charged with kidnapping a 17-year-old girl but not mentioning any date of the happening, the news story makes it seem as if the girl is still seventeen. Later the story refers to the victim as: In 2007, Cynthia and Mark Pollard Sr., along with their children, Jonathan, Tabitha and Mark Jr., were charged with kidnapping and enslaving 19-year-old Emily Nicely in Greensburg. Now she's 19? The article fails with continuity and the girl's age here.
Continue the discussion
Another crime article, Plea deal reached in Jeanette enslavement, kidnap case, focuses on a crime that happened in 2007. But why is it news? The newest information presented in this article is that a plea agreement was reached. This article uses a lot of space and words to provide such a simple update. There is also one thing that was confusing about this article. The lead reads: Three family members charged last month with kidnapping and enslaving a 17-year-old-runaway in Jeannette have reached a tentative plea agreement that includes jail time. By saying they were charged with kidnapping a 17-year-old girl but not mentioning any date of the happening, the news story makes it seem as if the girl is still seventeen. Later the story refers to the victim as: In 2007, Cynthia and Mark Pollard Sr., along with their children, Jonathan, Tabitha and Mark Jr., were charged with kidnapping and enslaving 19-year-old Emily Nicely in Greensburg. Now she's 19? The article fails with continuity and the girl's age here.
Continue the discussion
Kayla, for a local story, people are generally very interested to hear that a crime took place at a location that they drive past every day. You're right, though, since this story affects few people, and the effect is small, this story would not be of much interest to anyone outside the community in which it took place.
I guess we should consider ourselves fortunate that we live in an area where not much crime happens.
Oh, and I think it's significant that the story mentions the victim was a teenager at the time the crime took place, but you're right, something like "the victim, who is now 19," would be appropriate (if you can confirm that... she might be 18 or 20, depending on when her birthday falls.)