May 27, 2005

I Want to Live!


This was a truly eye-opening and touching story. After reading about Mrs. Wilson’s battle with cancer and approaching death, it just makes you want to live and enjoy life. So many passages stood out to me within this story.

“One afternoon after he left for work, she found a passage circled in his well-worn copy of Schopenhauer: ‘In early youth, as we contemplate our coming life, we are like children in a theater before the curtain is raised, sitting there in high spirits and eagerly waiting for the play to begin. It is a blessing that we do not know what is really going to happen.’”

As Mrs. Wilson found absolute truth and brilliance within this bit of philosophy, so do I. Life is a blessing given to us, and it is better to be lived unknowing of the future that lies ahead. I found this beautiful. “With Schopenhauer she could take long excursions from the grim specter of impending death. In Schopenhauer, particularly in his aphorisms and reflections, she found an absolute satisfaction, for Schopenhauer spoke the truth and the rest of the world was disseminating lies!”

“The son-in-law took antidepressants and claimed to be a melancholiac, yet he always seemed upbeat, comical, ready with a laugh. He had a sense of the absurd that she had found annoying back in the old days when she liked to pretend that life was a stroll down Primrose Lane.”

When friends visited with her before her death, Mrs. Wilson saw the love and affection they had for her. “They loved her, truly they did. She could see it. You couldn’t bullshit her anymore; she could see deep into the human heart; she knew what people were…”

I found it particularly interesting that as Mrs. Wilson approached her death that she so desperately wanted to avoid, she could see the truths and importance of life. It bothered her that everyone else was worried with trivial, meaningless things.

“The main players were assembled in the room. She… was nodding in and out but she could hear. There she was, in this apparent stupor, but she was more aware than anyone could know. She heard someone say somebody at McDonald’s put ‘everything’ on her hamburger instead of ‘cheese and ketchup only.’ They were making an issue out of it. One day, when they were in her shoes, they would learn to ignore this kind of petty stuff, but you couldn’t blame them. That was how things were, that’s all. Life. That was it. That was what it was. And here she lay… dying.”

This passage really hit home for me. While I can admit to taking life for granted and “sweating the small stuff,” I really can see the truth in what Mrs. Wilson is saying as she laid lying. What I can take from this story is a positive lesson and a reminder to make the most of everyday, and not stress or dwell on the negative. As Mrs. Wilson’s son-in-law seemed to be so happy, intelligent, and understanding of life, he also took anti-depressants. From Mrs. Wilson’s eyes, it really is relevant to today, as so many people really have everything going for them, but yet cannot get by without drugs like these. This story let me analyze how people really are in life… and how clear things become at the time leading up to death. We never know when our time will come, so value every moment and live! Live… just as Mrs. Wilson and so many unfortunate others who have passed only wish they had the chance to do!

Posted by KaylaTurano at May 27, 2005 7:04 PM | TrackBack